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My 8 yr old daughter loves school and evening activities but getting out of the house is always a challenge. She isn't self motivated to get ready and I nag and then yell in order to be on time.


Penny Warner Replied: She may need more time to prepare. If she doesn't wake up easily for school, give her some wake-up time half an hour before she has to get ready for school, and let her watch a video to ease into the day. If she isn't ready when it's time to go, maybe let her experience the consequences, such as having messy hair or being late for class, which are embarrassing. Reward and praise her when she does get ready on time, and let her know why it's important to be independent and do things herself.
Posted On 2007-02-13 13:12:04
Keith Muhleman Replied: Being on time is one of the big challenges for adults and they learned their habits very early. You are right to be concerned. One solution is to show that there are consequences for being late by telling her that if she is not ready on time, she must miss an event that she likes. School is a different matter and you should ask her teacher to help out with an explanation about being late for classes. Work with the teacher for a creative solution such as being late and not being able to participate in some school activity because she didn't watch the time. It may also be as simple as making sure she has a watch that she can read! Good luck. It is a problem that only grows older if unattended. Keith Muhleman
Posted On 2007-02-12 09:34:20
Mark Viator Replied: It sounds like you have the typical procrastinator. While she may love going to school and evening extra-curricular activities, she needs to be taught that it is her responsibility to be ready on time. It seems that you are being the "coach" to get her there on time. If having to nag and yell all of the time is the status quo, it is time to change the routine. Set up a schedule for her. Break down the steps of getting ready to go to school and evening activities. For example, list out her morning routine, such as brushing her teeth, fixing her hair, eating breakfast, etc.. Put a time limit for each one of these activities, then place this schedule in several places around the house. Let her know that you will check on her, but you will not nag or yell at her to complete them. If she finishes them in time, then she can go to the evening activity. If she does not, then she may be late or not go at all. With school, let her know that she will be expected to be on time. If she is late, or if you have to complete her schedule for her in order to be on time, then she will have a consequence, such as not going to that night's activity, after school. This schedule will allow for consistency in your child's routine as well as teach her responsiblity and independence. Good Luck.
Posted On 2007-02-10 08:34:43
Pamela Waterman Replied: We had a very reluctant 8-year-old non-morning person, too. Three changes made a huge difference: 1) When it's time for her to get up, or five minutes before (you can put a little timer in her room), go in, bring her a glass of juice, set it down, just say Good Morning, and leave. 2) Let her choose clothes the night before, and get her backpack ready ahead of time. and 3) Don't try to make conversation until she's ready to talk! Tell her ahead of time in the evening, when she's in a good mood, that this is what you're going to do, to help her help herself, so that she is in charge of her own timing. The juice is a huge help because her blood sugar can go low overnight, and this serves as a kick start. Our daughter is now 18 and still has the same traits, but as long as you leave her alone, she wakes up in her own way - she's been quite civil for years now!
Posted On 2007-02-09 22:42:32
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